Hey. Great to hear I’m not the only one with messy deaths. I should have been in line as well, my grandmother has already donated it all before she even died.
What I have found however is that those things are not at all important in the long run. Sure it may have made life a bit more comfortable, but what makes me comfortable is knowing that it won’t make them happy.
As I stated somewhere else, recently found out an extended family member died. Only know because I was tracing them down for information on some true inheritance, my children. It made me feel happy that they died and soon others will die without ANY children, grandchildren or true friends present at their funeral, if they even know of their deaths. One of them found out 24h before the service out of some sense of duty and called in from work only to find the whole thing (JW funeral) very odd.
Your true inheritance is the happiness of your children. Not some number on a bank account you cannot take with you. Your children and grandchildren should remember you and have fond memories of you, a story told for at least a few generations - that is how you will be remembered. You never hear people talk about their rich great-grandmother, often the wealth is already squandered by then.
My children don’t know their great-grandmother at all, their grandfather or the person that raised me either. They know a bit about their grandmother. Not all of them are JW anymore but they made mistakes that are hard to forgive and forget, relationships broken. But they will know about their great uncle that inspired their dad and that ethos lives on, they will know about their great-great grandfather that engineered the railroads for my home country, even though he died by the time I was 8. They will know about their great-grandfather that was instrumental at developing Teflon at DuPont. I don’t have their inheritances, which were sizable enough, my grandmother squandered it at the JW, others through drinking and drugs (partially also because they were raised JW). But I do have their stories, their ethos, their legacy on which I am building some wealth, not for me, not for the JW but for my children and theirs.